It’s the first day of classes, and the spring semester is gearing up. Apropos of this, I got a catalog for teaching materials this morning — I’m on several mailing lists for such things — and while flipping through it over a cup of coffee, I came across this fun tidbit.

Angelina Jolie published the journals that she kept while traveling as a goodwill ambassador for the UN High Commissioner for Refugees. The UN does have a habit of choosing interesting goodwill ambassadors (Ginger Spice, anyone?).

One can only imagine the eye-opening insights contained within its pages:

January 2, 2001.

Dear Diary,

Today I discovered that there is not a single collagen clinic anywhere in Cambodia. My lips are now flat and formless, and I fear that the very poor people with whom I meet are not able to appreciate the sadness that I feel at their plight as much as they would were my lips full and plump, and therefore far more able to pout.

I believe that pouting is the universal symbol, and that these people understand me better when I look good. They are all so poor and speak no English, so we are forced to resort to gestures, and, really, what better universal language is there than looking good and fashionable?

I have contracted some sort of rash from the local water. I have spoken to Driver, and told him that this is absolutely unacceptable. I can not believe that people live under such conditions. When I get home, I shall make it my absolute priority to have enough Evian shipped in for the entire country.

I must go now. I have been asked to speak at a local school for amputees, and I must exercise. Since these poor children have lost limbs, I feel that it is absolutely necessary for me to show that I am doing the most that I can with mine. I wouldn’t want to appear that I’m taking them for granted.

Sincerely,
Angelina.

Oh, it boggles the mind, don’t it?

(Before the flame wars start: I know she’s been very good at publicizing humanitarian issues and the like. This is a tongue-in-cheek post, and should be taken as such, mmmkay?)

Happy Monday!

Tags: angelina-jolie, celebrities, funny