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About Ramblings of a Hopeless Khowaga

Welcome to my Web site. My name is Chris, and I’ll be your host. I\'m an opinionated, snarky, gay academic with a predilection for the history, the Arab world, languages, photography, food, and music. I live in Austin, Texas. You can read more about me, learn 100 random things about me, and if you’re wondering what the heck a khowaga is, click here. Feel free to browse, read, and leave comments!

Tag: ‘brother’



Readin’, Ritin’ and Revivin’

Tuesday, May 5th, 2009

There are some times that I am less OK living in Texas than others.  The passage of the state’s second Defense of Marriage Act was one of them.  I fear we’re coming up on another, and I feel like I should be able to do something about it, but I don’t know what.

It’s come to the attention of just about everyone that the State Board of Education has been taken over by a bunch of radical loonies.  These are the sorts of conservatives who make conservatives uncomfortable, and somehow they managed to take over the body that’s charged with revising and implementing educational standards at the K-12 level.  (Thank Bob it’s only K-12.)

This would be the same board chaired by a dentist (!) from College Station who came under fire shortly before the board’s final vote on revised science standards for endorsing a book that referred to supporters of evolution as “monsters,” “atheists,” and “morons.” I want to make it clear that the board currently leans in the direction that believes that if you ain’t their kind of Christian, you’re not a Christian at all.  (The fact that this is exactly the kind of logic that Osama bin Laden and his ilk use is the kind of irony that isn’t lost on me, but would be shot down as “totally different” were it brought to their attention.)

Earlier this year, a call went out for people to review the social studies standards.  As an historian who works with K-12 educators a lot in my line of work, I put my name in.  I didn’t get selected, and it didn’t take long enough to realize why.  I didn’t know that the SBOE member who represents my district had sent out an e-mail claiming that Obama was a terrorist sympathizer, and that an attack by said terrorists would take place in the first six months of his administration, followed by the implementation of martial law.  (Perhaps we should secede just in case?)

Clearly my passioned e-mail describing my committment to global competencies was a bad idea.

I know several people who did get appointed to the committees (two of them went with me to Egypt in 2005).  One of them, a University professor at a rival institution, was appointed to the economics review committee and managed to cause a horrific furor when he had the audacity to suggest that the term “free enterprise system” be replaced with “capitalism” in the standards.  “Capitalism,” after all, is what it’s called in every college textbook, and he thought that it would be appropriate for K-12 students to use the same terminology that they would use in college.  Why call the same thing two different names?

To say that this was received very badly would be an understatement.  As I was told later, when one of the SBOE members saw this proposed change, she stood up and screamed, “What kind of anti-American sonofabitch did this?  You should be ashamed!  I swear, whoever you are, if you were one of my appointments, you can consider yourself fired!”  (note: committee members are unpaid – it’s all volunteer work.)

My other friend wrote me to say that, while her committee was congenial, others were concerned that “too much attention” was being paid to the rest of the world at the expense of “our” history. Another friend told of how someone was appointed to her review committee–which was to oversee one of the years of world studies–whose sole purpose was to state over and over that he had moral objections to students studying other cultures.

For the record, Texas schoolchildren have two years of American history (grades 8 and 11), one year of government (grade 12), one full year of Texas history (grade 7), world cultures (6), world history (10), and world geography (9).  More than one board member has stated the desire to replace either the 9th or 10th grade course with a third year of American history, apparently being unaware that the 12th grade government course is entirely American history content.

It gets better.

After the first round of review committee meetings, the board cancelled the second round, apparently afraid that further anti-Americanism might ensue, so they’ve decided to appont an “expert panel” to guide the revision process.

First up?  David Barton and the Reverend Peter Marshall.

In his books and teachings, [David Barton] argues that separation of church and state is a myth and that America’s laws should be based solely on Biblical scriptures. His numerous claims include that the Bible forbids income and capitol gains Taxes. Barton’s views are so far right that even such groups as the Texas Baptists Committee and the Baptist Joint Committee have been vocal critics of his interpretations of history and the U.S. Constitution.

Even better: “Marshall has previously suggested that the California wildfires and Hurricane Katrina were divine punishments on society for the tolerance of homosexuality.”

TODAY comes the news that they’re considering LYNNE CHENEY for the expert panel.

Cheney is well-known for crusading against national history and social studies standards in the 1990s, calling the standards–which the National Endowment for the Humanities helped fund while Cheney was its chair–”grim and gloomy.” Cheney also denounced the standards as a monument to political correctness, claimed they gave insufficient attention to Confederate General Robert E. Lee and the Wright brothers and focusing far too much on figures like Harriet Tubman, and worried that they concentrated too much on embarrassing episodes in the nation’s history, such as the Ku Klux Klan and McCarthyism.

Outraged?  You should be.  The science standards revision made us uncomfortable by flirting with intelligent design–this will make us look like fools.  The next revision won’t happen for another decade, by which point our students will be the laughingstock of the country.

I still can’t tell what can be done about this twisted version of Evangelicals Gone Wild!  I’ve got half a dozen pleas in my inbox to help find real experts to testify before the SBOE, but it’s obvious they don’t care what people like us think.  If you live in Texas, write your state legislator–seriously.  The Lege is already moving to restrict the power of the SBOE after the science and English debacles.

I know that there’s probably very little that I can do about this … but I’ll feel better when it’s all over knowing I did what I could.

12 of 12: January 2009

Monday, January 12th, 2009

12 of 12 was Chad’s idea.  All Hail Chad!

This first 12 of 2009, I find myself in Seoul, South Korea, with my partner Ray and my parents, where we’re visiting my brother who lives here.  We’ve been here almost a week, and so far there have been no injuries or altercations, and everyone is still alive!

9:11 am: Home Sweet Hotel

Jan09-1

Space isn’t at quite the same premium in Korea that it is in Japan, which is not to say that our hotel room is palatial.  Not with the amount of clothing we brought to ward off the cold (and it is cold y’all – yesterday the high was -10 C (around 15 F).  Today was considerably warmer … it got up to -3), and with the tendency toward shopping in markets that Ray and I have.

9:30 am: Coffee and a bagel

Jan09-2

I’m not sure why, but waffles and bagels are all the rage in Seoul.  You can’t go a block without tripping over another coffee-and-waffle/bagel joint.  This one is half a block from our hotel and the four of us can eat for under 20,000 won (roughly $18), which is the cost for a single person at the hotel.  The young lady behind the counter speaks decent English, too, which is a plus because none of the four of us speak Korean.  I’ve made a decent stab at learning part of the alphabet, but … well, let’s just say I can say “hello” and “thank you” and that’s about it.

11:06 am: Seoul Metro

Jan09-3

Kind of a late start today.  We’re off to visit my brother’s school.  He was able to take most of the time that we’re here off, but he had to work this morning so we arranged to come by and see the facility and go from there.

11:37 am: Conveyor Belt Sushi

Jan09-4

We all have our different interests when we travel.  Mom wanted to go by a supermarket just to see what local products are carried.  My brother’s school is in a district called Apugjeong, which our guidebook describes as “the Beverly Hills of Seoul.”  We wound up in the food hall at the Hyundai Supermarket, which I think is a bit like going to the food hall at Harrod’s in Knightsbridge.  It may serve the same function as a supermarket, but the similarity ends there.  Anyway, they had one of these little sushi counters with the conveyor belt, and I couldn’t help making a picture.

12:19 pm: Showing off to Mom

Jan09-5

At the school where my brother works.  Here he’s showing the rosters to mom.  (And, I know it’s probably not PC to point this out, but in case you’re wondering if this is the right photo: my brother was adopted, so, no, there’s no family resemblance, although we did manage to warp him nice and good anyway).

2:09 pm: Shopping!!!

Jan09-6

The pamphlet that the Seoul Tourism Board gives out describes Namdaemun market as “the most vibrant market in all of Asia.”  I question that (I guess technically the Grand Bazaar in Istanbul is on the European side, but I’m pretty sure there’s a few vibrant ones in India and Malaysia and Dubai and … )

But you can purchase pickled ginseng …

Jan09-7

… or all of your Korean dream hunks paraphernalia!

Jan09-8

5:37 pm: Pre-show drink

Jan09-9

Ray and I did pretty well where shopping is concerned.  My brother had made reservations for us at a place called Korea House, which does a traditional Korean meal followed by traditional cultural performance.  Basically, they combine a number of different things together into one show and give you about 10 minutes of each, so that just when you’ve had enough of one, it’s over.  Nice thinking, that.  We stopped in for a drink beforehand.  Hite is a local beer.  It’s cheap, but other than that there’s nothing to recommend it.

6:35 pm: All the pickled stuff you can eat

Jan09-10

8:09 pm: With the performers at Korea House

Jan09-11

Some of my best photos have been taken during cultural performances, but they don’t allow photography at Korea House during the show.  Rats.  Anyway, here’s Ray, Grace (my sister-in-law, for lack of a better term), my brother Lee, and me with some of the girls from the show.

8:34 pm: Seoul Metro

Jan09-12

Heading home.  Tomorrow is an early day for us, as we’re heading to Suwon, one of the suburbs, where there’s a “folk village” and an old fortress.  It’s also supposed to heat up to 0 degrees C (32 F), so we’re gonna break out the suntan lotion!

Happy 12th!

Quick Update

Saturday, January 10th, 2009

I’m still alive, and quite happy to say that the stomach troubles are a thing of the past. My brother has kept us going pretty much nonstop since we got here, so I haven’t had much time to write down any thoughts (or post them), none of which is aided by the glacial speed of the internet connection I’m stealing from a neighboring office building. For tomorrow’s 12 of 12, I may have to break down and actually go someplace with real wifi.

The temperature has dipped the past couple of days–naturally, those are the ones that we had set aside to visit the royal palace compound that’s mostly outside. The 90 minute tour was conducted in 45! Even though it was sunny, when it’s -10 C, it’s damned cold (that’s around 15 degrees F).

I posted some lo-res photos on my flickr if anyone’s interested – when I’m home and attached to something more high speed and less pirated, I’ll add better versions :)

On the Ground

Wednesday, January 7th, 2009

IMG_9022

Hello from Seoul, South Korea, where the local time is nearly 5 pm.  And when it’s 5 pm in Seoul, it’s 1967 in Austin, or something like that.  Who can keep track?

I won’t go into the agony of the second half of the flight last night … for long.  Suffice it to say that the stomach troubles of the previous evening re-asserted themselves an hour or two after I drafted the previous blog post and I spent the last half of the flight wondering whether I could put a permanent end to the whole ordeal by flushing myself down the toilet in the lavatory.

I was feeling better by the time we (finally!) landed at Incheon International Airport, at which point the entire flight crew knew who I was, and a registered nurse traveling in first class had been consulted about my “condition.”  To be perfectly honest, three days of nerves and being pressurized for 24 hours was probably more of a cause than anything else, but … I should remember to send a nice note to United, especially since I didn’t get the name of a single one of the flight attendants who came by regularly to check on me.

My brother came to meet us at the airport, which was a grandiose gesture on his part.  The “new” (opened in 2001) international airport in Seoul is actually located nearly 50 km west of the city center on a reclaimed island in the Yellow Sea, and it’s not particularly convenient to anywhere except the port city of Incheon.  He rode back with us on the airport limo (basically a motorcoach with wide seats) to our hotel, which is somewhat close to where he and my sister in law (who has the flu and hasn’t yet made an appearance) live, although isn’t terribly convenient to most of the tourist sites in Seoul.  It is, as I’ve discovered, within range of several wireless signals that I can pirate in order to avoid paying the 8,000 won/hour the hotel charges to use theirs (that’s about $6).

Although it was late (for us – around 9:30 pm), we had a quick meal at a place across the street called “Food Cafe,” where his recommendation of a local dish called ttuk dug, basically broth with mild vegetables and pressed rice cakes, went over very well with my tortured stomach.  Although I looked longingly at the dumplings going around the table, I decided to play it safe given the all-too-recent memories of my tortured maiden trans-Pacific crossing.

Today we’ve been easing in, sticking close to the hotel.  Lee took us to the mall, where we ate at the food court (and yes, my internal travel snob has choked on that one several times).  On the other hand, I can’t say with much honesty that I’d have been up for a heftier day of intensive sightseeing anyway – we’re all still walking zombies.  This 15 hour time change, plus the bewildering fact that we all think it should be Tuesday when it is, in fact, Wednesday, is wreaking havoc on all of us, so a day of milling about and easing into it isn’t the worst thing ever.

It is now probably the time when I should check in with the parental units to begin planning the rest of Family Vacation: Korea Edition.  More later!

eGads

Friday, January 2nd, 2009

It’s been a busy second day of January, 2009.  There are many errands to run, laundry to do, and a house to deChristmasify.  I usually take down all the Christmas decorations on New Year’s Day but … well, there was a lot of sleeping on New Year’s Day.  Has something to do with New Year’s Eve.  I’ll let you fill in the blanks *innocent look.*  About the most active we got was taking the dog to the park, which we did mainly because she gets to run around and play and we can just sit there.

Ray and I ran some errands this afternoon.  On Monday, the two of us, along with my parents, are off to Seoul, Korea, to visit my brother and sister-in-law.  In addition to the usual pre-travel chores (hit the trial sized section of the SprawlMart to gather various and sundry toiletries in 3 ounce-or-less sizes), we have been invited to one of my brother’s friend’s daughter’s birthday party (got all that)?  She’s going to be one … which I think in Korea means she’s actually two … and it’s a huge deal.  In other words, gifts are expected.

I have to admit that I do not have the full range of gay genes.  I enjoy the fine food and wine.  I’m picky and choosy and a bit of a snob about certain things (wine does not come in a box).  I’ve been known to enjoy show tunes.  I have a decent sense of style (mostly expressed in disapproval of other peoples style).

I do not, however, possess the shop-till-you-drop gene (third world markets are an exception), and I find myself at my most fish-out-of-waterish when I am in the presence of things that can be described using one or more of the following words: “cute,” “precious,” and/or “darling.”  Hence, buying a birthday present for a female toddler?  Not exactly something I’m cut out for.

Ray provided the solution–we bought her a board game: Chutes and Ladders.  Yeah, it’s a little above her age, but what can you get for a toddler that she won’t outgrow in a few months?  Everyone remembers this game from their childhood when they were coveting their female playmates’ things, right?  It was surprisingly inexpensive, and we bought wrapping paper.  The decision now is whether to wrap it before we go or just put the roll in the suitcase and wrap it there.  “Either way,” I told Ray, “it’s going in your suitcase.”  (I still hold the title of “Man most likely to have been strip searched before getting on this plane.”)

So … then we went to checkout.

I have an unparalleled talent for picking the absolute slowest lane in the store, without fail.  What’s interesting about this is that I also have a knack for picking the shortest lane in the store, and I’ve recently decided to start taking detailed notes about how lines can be both short and incredibly slow.

The other day, Ray and I were at Sam’s Club (yeah, I know.  Shut up.) to pick up supplies for a party that a friend had asked us to get.  We had exactly one item.  Ray was looking at something, and I got into the express lane behind two other people.  One of them had one single item, the other had two.

Naturally, the first lady decided to pay by check, a process that makes getting into the United States (especially when you’re me) look easy.  I also don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone take that long to write a check in my life – I’m not sure if she was writing it out in Copperplate script or something, but she just kept writing … and writing … and writing.

The next lady, who had a Sam’s Club membership … in her own name … didn’t know that you have to pay cash, debit, or with a MasterCard at Sam’s.  She only had an American Express card.  This was a lengthy, lengthy discussion, which eventually ended with her friend pulling out … you guessed it!  Her checkbook.

All told, it took close to ten minutes for us to get through the express lane.

Today, I got in line behind a man with one item.  As we walked up to the register behind him, the cashier was finishing up with her previous transaction, and seemed to be wildly preoccupied with little pieces of paper on her workstation onto which she was writing random numbers.  She was also carrying on a lengthy conversation.  With herself.

I must give the guy in front of us credit — he was very smooth.  He said, calmly and a little louder than the situation required, “Good afternoon, ma’am.  How are you today?”

She kept messing with the slips of paper and talking to herself.  Finally, a full thirty seconds later, she looked up and, as if seeing him for the first time, exclaimed, “Hello!  Just the one item?”

At this point, I started to giggle a little bit, just because … well, my luck is just that good!

Anyway.  I hope you had a relaxing New Year’s, and may all your checkout lines be short and speedy!

 

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