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About Ramblings of a Hopeless Khowaga

Welcome to my Web site. My name is Chris, and I’ll be your host. I\'m an opinionated, snarky, gay academic with a predilection for the history, the Arab world, languages, photography, food, and music. I live in Austin, Texas. You can read more about me, learn 100 random things about me, and if you’re wondering what the heck a khowaga is, click here. Feel free to browse, read, and leave comments!

Tag: ‘drinking’



The Horrible Patient

Tuesday, December 2nd, 2008

It’s kind of ironic, I guess, that I wait until after the holiday and weeks after being around a bunch of ill people at work before I finally succumb to the head cold that’s been going around. The weather in Austin has been up and down lately — last night we hit a low near freezing — and given the stress I’ve been under, it’s not surprising that I got sick.

I’ve recognized for a while that I’m a bad sick person. In my case, the problem is that the moment I feel even slightly better I overexert myself and make my illness worse.

I never realized how much dedication goes in to the hypochondria and perpetual illness that some people seem to have. Would that I had the temperament to lay about demanding that others wait on me hand and foot. “Boy! Pit me an olive!”

So, I’m trying to be really good today, sitting on the sofa, keeping warm, drinking lots of liquids, and watching … OK, I’m not quite at the point where I can deal with mediocre daytime television. My head cold isn’t quite severe enough for me to deal with Elizabeth Hasselback. I don’t care how ill I feel, I’m not quite that ill.

But maybe I’m feeling ill enough for someone to bring me some soup? :wink:

12 of 12: July 2008

Saturday, July 12th, 2008

It’s time for 12 of 12 again!

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We’re having a fire ant problem in the house – they’re all over the kitchen and eating the bait right and left … and leaving crumbs in it, too.  Ugh.  They were all over the sofa when I sat down this morning – that was new, and I flipped out and went out to get the big guns:

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So, first thing this morning I spread out the fire ant treatment.  This afternoon, I found them in the dishwasher.  The dishwasher!

To borrow a line from a recent Hollywood B-movie, I’ve had it with these mother$*&#ing ants in my mother$*&#ing house!

Mocha

Mocha, as you can see, is significantly less interested in the ant problem.

Mocha and her Monkey

And here she takes a nap with her stuffed monkey.

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Ray and I got out of the house to go meet our friend Michael.

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We met up at Chuy’s, a local Tex-Mex restaurant best known for its jalapeno ranch dip (oh, and the time they busted Jenna Bush for underage drinking).

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After that, the three of us went to the movies – we went to see the new version of Journey to the Center of the Earth in 3D.

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For the record, the 3D is an extra $3.  I kind of agree with the New York Times about the movie: if it weren’t for the 3D, it would have been pretty bad.  So make sure that if you do go, you see it in 3D.  You get to keep the damned glasses, at least.  That almost (OK, not really) makes up for the ticket price.

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Back home, Mocha is agitating for a walk.  However, she had to wait because it’s flipping hot in Texas these days – we hit 99 degrees today (37 C).

For dinner, Ray and I went to a local Pho place that we like.  Ray attempted to emulate the pose of … well, here’s Ray:

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and here (this isn’t one of the 12) is the owner of a restaurant in Monterrey, Mexico, called “El Rey del Cabrito” who looks just a little too excited about the food his restaurant serves:

Menu

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Pho rocks.  heh.

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OK, so this might seriously be the most Texas photo I’ve ever taken.  Dairy Queen on a Saturday night.

Ray didn’t have to convince me very hard to swing by to pick up the “Blizzard of the Month” because this month it features Thin Mint Girl Scout Cookies.  Thin Mints are my weakness, they’re the thing that I have those stories about?  You know, the ones that start, “This one time when I was in college, I ate a whole box of Thin Mints … “

I ordered a small.  And it was goood…

Happy 12th, everyone!  Hey, take my if you haven’t done so already!

In search of the perfect maitai

Sunday, April 20th, 2008

I wasn’t such a good blogger this week. Michael IM’ed me at one point to tell me that my blog just wasn’t the same without photos of Hawaii pasted all over it, and I can emphasize. I’ve been trying to get a little more color in these pages, and somehow “work sucks” doesn’t inspire much color. Or commentary.

So…

Ray and the tikis

Ray’s birthday is coming up next month. I had already promised our friends that we would have a tiki party when we got back from Hawaii, and somehow the tiki party and Ray’s birthday got mixed together, so now we’re having a tiki birthday party for him. Planning it has been remarkably fun because there’s so much tiki party crap out there. (Seriously — there are some hard core tikiphiles out there. Check out konakai.com to see what I mean.)

The most important items on the menu for any tiki/Hawaiian themes party, however, are the drinks. You’ve got to have tropical drinks, and the sort of classic beginning for a Hawaiian drink is a maitai.

Looks Hawaiian, don’t it?

The problem, as I have discovered is … well, numerous-fold.

First off, there is such a thing as maitai mix on the market. However, I have recently developed something of an issue with drinks that are mostly colored corn syrup. Seriously, the next time you hit the grocery or liquor store, look at those margarita and piña colada mixes and check out the inclusion of “high fructose corn syrup” as one of the ingredients. There are very, very few that use anything else — I like Stirrings, which uses cane sugar, but man, it’s expensive. I recently started making margaritas with fresh limeade from the grocery store. They’re pretty damned good if I do say so myself.

The next issue is that no two people seem to be able to agree on what actually goes in to a maitai. The bartender cheat sheet that we have at home gives the following recipe:

1 part light rum
1 part dark rum
2 parts pineapple juice
splash of grenadine
garnish with cherry, pineapple slice, umbrella, and any other flair floating about the house

I find pineapple juice just a little too bitter on its own, so I’ve been using pineapple/mango juice. It comes out nice and fruity with a little bite to it:

So, while I was perusing the above tiki Web site and its myriad of links, I decided to get some inspiration for other drinks to serve at the party. You’ve got to have Blue Hawaiians, because they’re blue. You can’t go wrong with blue drinks at a tiki party.

However, I was a bit puzzled/alarmed to discover that one site, which claims to be engaging in the search for the definitive maitai recipe, included these words: “the original maitai included only lime juice. For this reason, anything that includes any other kind of fruit juice (orange, pineapple) is not a real maitai.”

Who knew?

Now, speaking blunty, some of the recipes I’ve found are just cheating (you don’t use orange juice, you use orange curaçao or triple sec). But I dutifully tried some of the recipes just to see how they came out … and wound up adding the pineapple juice anyway because they came out so bitter.

The other problem is that the “definitive recipes” include things like orgeat — almond syrup — and something called “rock candy syrup.” I know of a place locally that probably carries them, and I’ll check them out … and the first thing I’m going to do is look at the ingredients to check for high fructose corn syrup. If I want my guests going into diabetic shock, it’ll be from the food, thank you very much.

Otherwise, I’ll just stick with my current recipe, which is:

2 parts dark rum
2 parts light rum
1 part lime juice
1 part orange curaçao
a good helping of pineapple/mango juice (roughly 4 parts)
a splash of grenadine
flair

Shake and serve over ice.

On to testing the next recipe. This is the kind of homework I can get with! :mrgreen:

So — anyone have other tiki drink suggestions?

Just say no to Jaeger

Monday, August 6th, 2007

Too many posts from people extolling the virtues of Jaegermeister lately. What is it with Jaeger?

Yesterday, Ray and I stood in line at our local Subway (for … ever … ) behind a guy with a Jaegermeister key lanyard hanging out of his pocket. It went so well with his massive earring – one of those ones that requires you to drill a hole in your ear that would leave Ndebele tribeswomen drooling with envy — and his requisite Blockbuster Video employee polo shirt.

This is in addition to Danny’s comment the other day about Jaeger curing what ails you, and now Daniel’s getting free Jaeger bomb shots. What is it with this stuff? It’s like it’s following me around, taunting me. I am resisting the temptation to find out. No Jaeger for me. I know too many stories about Jaeger that end with projectile vomiting.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to sit over here with my bottle of ouzo and console myself. So Nyah. :wink:

More Power, Cat

Wednesday, September 20th, 2006

I was reading the New York Times online, as I am want to do on a daily basis because it’s a hell of a lot cheaper (read: free) than getting it delivered to my front door in Round Rock, Texas, and one of the articles reached out and caught my eye. It’s called 9 Lives and Counting: Cat Power Sobers Up.

Who is this Cat Power, you ask, and why did this article catch my eye? Well, as it turns out, Ray and I went to see Cat Power (bka Chan Marshall, formerly of the Go-Gos) at Stubb’s on Sunday night. She’s a bit of a weird one, that Cat. She was with a large backing band – The Memphis Blues Rhythm Band – and she seemed a little odd on stage.

She danced around like a ballerina – one with about 3 minutes of training – and did these weird hand motions, and sang at really weird angles to the microphone that simply can not be good for someone trying to belt out tunes in her low voice (she sounds like the lead singer of Cowboy Junkies). She smoked during the performance (the truth being that Stubb’s is one of the few places in Austin where you can still get away with that), and had one of those dark brown amber bottles within close reach for most of the performance. It was definitely one of the more odd performances that I’ve ever seen – like Grace Slick odd, like at any moment she might sit down on the edge of the stage and chewing us out for letting George W. Bush get elected president.

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Well, this article in the New York Times sheds some light on a lot of her weird behavior (I’m sorry to have missed the show where she spent lots of time talking to a squirrel – it sounds like it would have been fun).

Painfully shy, she’s been battling depression and exhaustion, and went into rehab earlier this year. Gee, no wonder she wasn’t that chatty on stage. Who wants to introduce a song with “So, here’s one I wrote while I was going through withdrawal. It reminds me of good times”?

To her credit, Cat Power did mention at one point during the performance that the beer she was drinking was O’Doul’s (non-alcoholic) and that she’d be happy to endorse the product, in case anyone from the company happened to be in the audience.

And the performance? She was pretty good. I couldn’t sing one of her songs from memory if you asked me to, but the band was rocking and she was perfectly happy to be out there, giving it her all.

Although she might want to consider some ballerina lessons – it really is never too late to start!

 

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