Amazon.com Widgets
I’m not mad.  Really.

About Ramblings of a Hopeless Khowaga

Welcome to my Web site. My name is Chris, and I’ll be your host. I\'m an opinionated, snarky, gay academic with a predilection for the history, the Arab world, languages, photography, food, and music. I live in Austin, Texas. You can read more about me, learn 100 random things about me, and if you’re wondering what the heck a khowaga is, click here. Feel free to browse, read, and leave comments!

Tag: ‘Travel’



Rest and Relaxation

Thursday, August 20th, 2009

My wanderings around the state have come to an end, and not a moment too soon.  I do enjoy the traveling, but there comes a point when you’re in yet another hotel chain that looks like any other hotel chain (LaQuinta?  Fairfield Inn?  Hampton Inn?  Is there a difference?) when you realize that you simply can’t face one more morning with Faux News blaring in the background over another styrofoam plate and plastic fork breakfast featuring KAW-FEE brand coffee bean product and individually wrapped English Muffins (which are neither English nor muffins.  Discuss).

There is the occasional quirkiness to be had.  Despite the fact that San Angelo–which only two years ago was proudly putting in all of its tourist literature that it had the highest murder rate west of the Mississippi between 1850 and 1870–is now trying to bill itself as the culture capitol of the Panhandle Plains (a title that is disputed by … well, no one), the town is relatively uninteresting.  A tour around town on a Sunday evening revealed a frightening number of businesses with Christian names (such as: Bible Automotive.  I’m not kidding.) and a dearth of business actually open to the public.  After eating Mexican food from a restaurant that clearly used to be a service station (the food wasn’t bad — Bobby Flay had apparently been there at one point), Natalie and I wound up at Baskin Robbins … along with half the town because, as I may have mentioned, there was nothing else open at 7 pm on a Sunday.

Then there was the unexplained psychedelic van (above) that I stopped to photograph on the way out of town.  And this place:

This place practices false advertising: there are no man’s for sale in the man’s shop.

My most recent trip ended a scant three hours ago with a flourish and flutter (literally: the woman sitting next to me apparently cramming for a medical school exam who had refused four requests to put away her book and notes for landing seemed surprised when it all flew up the aisle upon touchdown.  That’ll learn her).

We were over in El Paso, the one place in the state that, it is regularly agreed upon, we must fly to.  I’ve heard rumors that you can drive it in under eight hours now, with the speed limit on I-10 through west Texas now legally at 80 miles per hour, but I’m more happy to reduce it to an hour and twenty minutes on Southwest Airlines.

I have always liked going to El Paso — in fact, I’ve enjoyed all of our trips to the border area, both in West Texas and down in the Rio Grande Valley (for the uninitiated among you, even though technically El Paso is on the Rio Grande, the term “Rio Grande Valley” seems to only apply to the part between Laredo and Brownsville, on the Gulf of Mexico).  We usually get groups that are really energetic and happy to learn, and this was the case with our session yesterday.  One of the guys was so enthusiastic that he engaged me in conversation in the men’s room.  I am not a particular fan of the conversation-while-I-pee.  If you see me in the men’s room, please don’t strike up a conversation until I’m at the sink, OK?

It’s also saying something about the sort of people that Natalie and I are that we kept coming back to the five or so really negative evaluations we collected at the end of the day.  There were 68 people in the room–our largest audience ever.  The vibe was overwhelmingly positive, but we still kept coming back to those negative ones.  I think somehow we just need to validate that the criticism isn’t valid–we’ve gotten unenthusiastic comments before, but this time the people who didn’t like us really didn’t like us, and they weren’t shy about expressing it.

At the end of the day, though, this last trip was a good note to end the late summer training sessions on.  We had a new audience, and they seemed to be happy with what we were doing.  The people who invited us were effervescent.  And then it was off to have a nice drink in the historic Dome Bar in the lobby of our hotel, the historic Hotel Paso del Norte.

And now … I’m home.  Next up is a trip to a conference in San Juan, Puerto Rico toward the end of September.  Technically it’s work.  I just wonder if I can put sunscreen on my expense account :D

12 of 12: August 2009

Thursday, August 13th, 2009

So, I’m a day late and a dollar short for 12 of 12.  Yes, it’s the 13th.  Shoot me ;)

Unlike last month when I posted my 12 from Egypt, this time … I was taking a day off from work.  I got home late the night before from Abilene, and I was due, dagnabbit.

8:41 am: French Press

August-1

I’ve recently discovered the magic of the french press and the full bodied nutty coffedy goodness that it can provide when you have the time to wait for it…

9:17 am: Doggie break.

August-2

My parents went to New York for a long weekend, and we agreed to sit their dog, formally known as Brandy.  However, because she startles really easily, we call her Boo.

9:37 am: Editing Photos

August-3

Editing some shots I took on my business trip to west Texas.  This one is from San Angelo.  It’s completely false advertising, by the way: they sell no men in the man’s shop.

10:01 am: Reading

August-4

I do not relax well.  However, I decided to try my hand by reading for a good chunk of the morning.

11:31 am: Furmination Time

August-5

If you are the owner of a short-haired dog who sheds all over creation, and you have not discovered the wonders of the Furminator, you are totally missing out.

11:31: You Can’t See Me

August-6

Brandy-Boo is small enough that she can try to hide behind blades of grass.  And the hair that’s always in her eyes.  No wonder she thinks we can’t see her–she can’t see us through that mop!

12:04 pm: Lunch

August-7

Trying to keep healthy.  Ray has lost 20 pounds in two months.  So have I.  The difference is that he’s lost 20 pounds, and I’ve lost 10 pounds twice.  It’s all the traveling.  Honest.

3:17 pm: The Kudzu Covered Walls of Higher Ed

August-8

I had a potluck to attend last night–a reunion for the trip to Turkey last month–and I needed to run to the store for stuff.  On the way, I stopped by the Round Rock Higher Education Center, because three of my photos are on display there.

3:20 pm: My first show!

August-9

It’s a photo exhibition of “places and spaces that matter” in Round Rock.  3 of the 20 photos are mine.  My first show!  *sniff*  I’m so proud.  This is one I took in the slave section of the old cemetery a while back.

4:39 pm: Making Simple Syrup

August-10

I’m bringing baklava for the potluck.  Real baklava does not have honey in it, dammit.  It’s simple syrup.

5:49 pm: The finished product.

August-11

Yes, you may have my recipe.  It’s right here.

6:51 pm: Rain Clouds

August-12

They got an inch of rain in Austin.  In Round Rock, we got … about ten drops.  Bah.

The reunion ran long, so I didn’t get to post this last night.  Honest.  I’ll get a doctor’s note!

And how was YOUR twelfth?

Cuh-Cuh-Cuh-Clusterfuck

Tuesday, August 4th, 2009

Note: names have been changed to protect those in need of protecting from my foot up their ass.

Howdy, y’all!

I’m currently in a hotel room right underneath the flight pattern from the active takeoff runway at Houston Intercontinental Airport (Continental’s 777 bound for London went over a little while back — boy, was she noisy!).

Today was not a good day.  In fact, today was the sort of day that the term “clusterfuck” was invented to describe.  I’m over it now, but first … first I’m going to blog about it :twisted:

(more…)

And all I got was a pair of Chatty Kathys

Friday, July 31st, 2009

Allow me, if you will, a moment of political incorrectness that nearly every member of the flying public has had at some point or another.

You’ve boarded an aircraft.  You’re in your seat, and there is an empty seat next to you.  It’s now late in the boarding process, but people are still coming down the aisle with that pensive look that is, frankly, a little mystifying.  (Seriously, what’s causing that overly confused look?  Are they seriously thinking to themselves, “According to my boarding pass, I’m sitting in row 23.  I wonder where that is in relation to row 10?  Oh, if only there were some systematic way of ordering rows on airplanes so that I wouldn’t have this problem!”)

Perhaps you have a coveted window seat.  Perhaps, like me, you’re a little taller than the average person and so you enjoy a good aisle seat.  Aisle seats have a lot of legroom, but if you’re flying on your own–as I frequently am–you have to get up once or twice to let someone by you, so it’s hard to relax until your aisle mates have arrived.

And so … as the plane starts to fill up, you do it.  Don’t deny it–you have, too, done it.  You start scrutinizing the people walking in–and there’s always that moment of, “Oh, no, please don’t let him/her be sitting here.”  Sometimes it’s a mother with an infant in arms that’s already fussing.  Sometimes it’s a child traveling on their own.

On a flight to DC several months back, I was next to a woman who was very sweet, but also very large.  Although I did enjoy talking with her, when we landed in DC I had a very sore back because I had spent most of the flight leaning toward the aisle out of necessity–it was physically impossible for me to sit upright in my seat because, well, she was occupying part of it.

It’s not her fault — frankly, we as Americans are larger people in both stature and, um, girth–and our airlines seem to be shrinking the size of the average seat.  Seriously, have you flown on one of those regional jets?  Even I can’t put the tray table down without leaving a red crease across my naval.  I have found myself fighting for control of the armrest with skinny people.  There is no privacy on an aircraft — the number of businessmen who whip out those laptops and start working on confidential memos — if I’m sitting next to you, kids, I can read every single word on your laptop screen.

However, whatever experiences I’ve had–and you’ve had–here’s one I’m happy to have not had:

Friday,  July 31, 2009 10:33 AM
ASSOCIATED PRESS

CAIRO — An official at Cairo’s airport says a foot-long baby crocodile wriggled out of a passenger’s hand luggage and caused panic on a flight from the United Arab Emirates.

A crew member on the EgyptAir flight from Abu Dhabi rounded up the wayward reptile and calmed passengers. The airport security official says the animal was seized and given to the Cairo Zoo.

Transporting exotic animals in and out of the Egypt is illegal, and none of the passengers on today’s flight claimed ownership of the baby croc.

The airport official spoke on condition of anonymity because he is not authorized to speak to the press.

Where’s Samuel L. Jackson when you need him?  Honestly.

So, the next time you find yourself on an aircraft, consider yourself lucky if one of your aisle mates isn’t toting a killer reptile.  Or a skunk.  Or … well, it’s not like they’d have the room to take it out of their luggage anyway!  :twisted:

Vignettes

Sunday, July 19th, 2009

I’m back home in Austin.  I flew home on Friday, a long day that involved a lot of nodding off in odd places.  I had to leave for the airport at 1 am, so there wasn’t any actual sleep (I tried to nap a little in my hotel room, but I kept jerking awake out of fear that I’d oversleep).

As usual, the Cairo Airport luggage cart mafia got the last word: As I was standing in line to go through security (in many international gateways, you have to go through X-ray with your luggage before you get to check-in), I was asked which airline I was flying.

“Turkish,” I said.
“This line is for Olympic,” he said.  (For the record: this is BS.  The ticket lobby is wide open once you go through security — there is no “this line is for this airline, and that line is for that airline.”)  I knew where this was going, but before I could stop him, he’d grabbed my luggage and started walking at an extremely fast pace across the terminal to the next checkpoint over.
“You give me money now,” he said.”  He wound up with 1 Egyptian pound and 1 US dollar — the last cash I had on me.

I may have mentioned this before, but it’s worth saying again: I hate Cairo Airport.  It’s a pit of snakes.

Fortunately, there were better moments on this trip.

Al-Azhar at Night

One evening, I suggested to a friend who hadn’t seen much of the city besides the campus where he was studying and the apartment where he lived that we visit the old city in the evening.  The snakes who run the Khan al-Khalili bazaar tend to be a little less venomous toward the end of the day.  Shortly out of the cab, I wandered over to the newly restored area between the Wikala and Madrassa of Sultan al-Ghori, which I hadn’t seen since the restoration was complete.  While looking at the new roof over the area, a man wandered over to us and struck up a conversation.  His English wasn’t the best, so the conversation took place primarily in Arabic.

It turned out that he was working on the restoration project, and after a few moments, he offered to show us around.  I’m normally leery of offers like this as they tend to end with a bill being produced, but he seemed pretty genuine and kept insisting that he wasn’t doing it for baksheesh.

For the next two hours, we wandered the back streets south of al-Azhar mosque.  Granted, he showed us a lot of craft workshops that made things neither of us were interested in buying, but it didn’t seem to bother him.

The only point where money entered into the conversation was when we went down to Bab Zuwayla, the southern gate to old Cairo that dates from 970 AD.  The mosque of Shaykh Moizz li-din Allah adjoins the bab, and for a little bribing, you can get the caretaker to let you up on the roof.

_MG_3752

As we were up on top of the mosque, with its view of the old city and the cliffs of Muqattam that border Cairo to the east, the muezzins began making the call to prayer (the azan).  From our vantage point, you could hear muzzein after muezzin chanting from the city’s four thousand mosques, the sounds echoing off of each other and weaving into a great chant that is, to me, one of the most quintessential sounds of Egypt: prayer, street activity, and traffic.  How Cairo.

As we descended, he asked us to make a donation to the mosque, which we were happy to do.  After that, it was back to the main street where he’d met us, with a handshake and a good bye.  I gave him a little Austin lapel pin that I had left over from the trip to Turkey, and with that we were on our way.

The next day, I returned to the old city on my own to wander all over creation and shoot some photos.  I came on my own deliberately, as I know my interest in architecture and little alleyways is not shared by many … OK, most … of my friends.  I’ve learned that it’s better to just come on my own.

There was a slightly ugly incident near Bab al-Nasir, one of the two northern gates of the city.  As I was passing a small food stall, the guy working the fry station practically threw a piece of ta’amiyya (Egyptian felafel — it’s made with fava beans instead of chick peas) at me.  The next thing I knew, I was being bodily pulled into the restaurant, made to sit at a table, and plates of food that I didn’t want were placed in front of me.  I just wasn’t hungry, and I wasn’t entirely comfortable, as I imagined that this exchange was going to end with an outrageous bill being presented.  I wasn’t wrong.

The conversation started off nicely enough, with the usual, “Where are you from?  What’s your name?” questions, and a bit of bizarre cross cultural communication took place when it was revealed that I apparently have the same first name as The Undertaker from WCW(?).  There was a moment of admiration of the bandana that I carry as a sweat rag.  This is nothing new, and I’ve learned to carry spares.  These were given out -  I had enough for all the guys in the stand, but then things got ugly.

“I’ve got a kid,” said one of the guys.  “What do you have for him?”
“Um … ” I looked in my camera bag.  To my shock, he actually reached in and pulled something out, and I smacked his hand, and snarled at him.  The phrase Leh keddah literally means “What’s this?” but said the right way it connotes “WTF, dude?”  I eventually parted with a hotel pen that I’d picked up somewhere in my travels, and then decided it was time to make my exit.  I was presented with a bill for 30 pounds ($6 – which is probably a 500% inflation over what a local would have paid) and then everyone started asking for a tip.  Fortunately, by this time, I was far enough outside the restaurant that they couldn’t block my way, so I pretended I couldn’t understand and walked away.

I was irritated by this experience, and kept trying to calm myself down by reminding myself that I hadn’t spent that much, when a woman wearing a niqab (the face veil with a slit for the eyes) came up to me, motioning with her hands.  She was a beggar.

The guys at the restaurant had taken all of my small bills, and I just didn’t have anything.  I did, however, have a bag of leftover ta’amiya and french fries.  “I don’t have any money,” I said.  “Would you like food?”

She looked at me, puzzled.  “You speak Arabic?”  (This was an odd comment, considering that I’d spoken to her in Arabic, but I’m used to it.  There’s something about looking the way I do and speaking Arabic that just causes brains to short circuit all over Egypt).
“Yeah.”
This was followed by the usual questions about where I was from, etc., and I gave her the food and headed off.  At which point she asked me if I wanted to take her photo — a bit of a startling question from a woman in a face veil!

I headed down through the Khan al-Khalili as quickly as possible and crossed the bridge to the relative safety of the other side.  My plan was to walk down through Bab Zuwayla and then down through the Khan of the tentmakers and through the neighborhood beyond.

This is an area that’s not frequented by foreigners, but if my presence caused any consternation, it didn’t show.  A couple of boys asked me to take their photo.

Boys

I’m ashamed that I don’t remember their names.

The only incident happened further down the street.  I stopped to snap a photo of a mosque, and the guy working at a street cart selling pots and pans, asked me, “What are you taking a photo of?  I don’t want any photos of me!”
“I took a photo of the mosque,” I said.
“The mosque?” he asked.  I showed him on the LCD panel on my camera, and suddenly the scowl was replaced with a big smile and a thumbs up.

And that was it.  So much for the seething anti-Americanism on the Arab street.

Even that night, when my friend and I came back to see the Sufis and visit the newly lit up monuments north of the Khan al-Khalili, it was a mixture of ignorance and cheerful questions.  And the monuments do look incredible at night.

Shari'a Moizz at Night.

And so.  When I got to Cairo, I remembered thinking, “How am I going to fill up this time?”  By the time it was over, it seemed like it went so quickly.

Which is not to say that I wasn’t ready to come home.  Probably the ugliest moment on the entire trip occurred the morning before I left, in the form of an e-mail from work.  Someone on the organizing committee of a conference I’m working on sent a message that was so ugly that it actually brought tears to my eyes.  By the time I saw the message, several others had weighed in, and there was a message from my boss asking me not to respond to it because, “I’ve already told her in no uncertain terms that this message is completely unacceptable.”   Even so, it put me in an absolutely foul mood, and my brain has been wandering back to it ever since (12 hour flights are great for stewing).  It was a nasty reminder of things waiting for me when I go back to work tomorrow.

And so.  I have vague memories of the plane taking off from Cairo at 3:30 am on Friday, and equally vague memories of the plane landing in Istanbul.  I found a bench to sleep for part of the 6 hour layover in Istanbul and conked out again for a good chunk of the flight from Istanbul to Chicago.  (The two bottles of wine served with lunch might have helped).

And now, I’m home where it’s hotter than it was in Egypt!  But I’m happy to be back with Ray and Mocha and not spending a lot of money all the time — Egypt has gotten significantly more expensive over the past couple of years.  The economic recession has not been kind there.

All the same … well, I’m not planning my next trip back yet, but it’s always in the back of my mind.  That’s just kind of the way I am.

 

Blog Theme by LJP & SLR Lounge